30 Adult Holiday Puns to Share with Your Random Assortment of Extended Family Members
Holiday puns just sleigh me.
Enjoy these puns perfect for the holidaze! After smoking a joint, yule find yourself laughing out loud at these mistle-totally hilarious holiday puns.
What does Santa say to someone asking if one of his workshops is available for rent?
For lease, Navidad!
What kind of music do elves listen to while they work?
What do literary geniuses call Santa’s helpers?
What’s the most attractive thing about your Christmas Tinder date?
Big Deck (the halls) Energy.
What does Rudolph turn into after a bong rip?
Rudolph the red-eyed reindeer.
What does the un-decorated Christmas tree say to the Christmas tree full of ornaments?
You got a lot of balls coming in here dressed like that.
What do you call someone obsessed with Christmas?
What does Destiny’s Child sing during the holidays?
Sleigh my name, sleigh my name…
How much do I love Hanukkah?
What does Santa say when he’s in the mood to get it on?
When I think about you, I touch my elf.
What does someone have if they don’t want to go to a crowded Christmas party?
What’s the best way to wish someone a happy Hanukkah?
Wish them a happy challah-days.
What’s the next best way to wish someone a happy Hanukkah?
Tell them that you hope their holiday isn’t dreidull.
What do say when someone finds out they’re not the real father on Christmas?
What does Santa drink while he’s in the sleigh?
What do you say when you gift someone an assortment of spices as a present?
What is Snoop Dogg’s favorite part about the holiday season?
The rapping paper.
What did Dancer say to Prancer at the strip club?
Make it rain, dear.
What’s Chipotle’s favorite holiday song?
Guacin’ in a winter wonderland
What does a reindeer say to the reindeer who celebrates Hanukkah?
What does my man have in common with my stockings?
They’re both hung.
What did one stoner gingerbread cookie say to the other stoner gingerbread cookie?
Let’s get baked.
What did one stoner menorah say to the other stoner menorah?
Let’s get lit.
How do you politely hint to your family that you want weed for Christmas?
Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree…
What’s the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
What’s Ariana Grande’s next Christmas single?
Santa is a Woman.
What’s the best way to spread Christmas queer?
Singing yaaasss for all to hear!
What did a jedi master say to a kid on Christmas?
I know what you’re getting for Christmas, because I can feel your presents.
What did the stoned mermaid say when she got the munchies?
Sea Be Dee – licious!
What’s the most messed up Christmas movie?
Happy holidaze, and a blazing new year!